The Defense of John Mayer

Yes you read that right. The DEFENSE of John Mayer. Every time a white guy goes on TV or gives an interview and says something concerning race he is looked at as being racist. More often than not that is the case. But sometimes people can be trying to prove a point but it just comes out wrong, who can say that’s never happened to them. Personally, I was never offended with the Don Imus comments. If we’re gonna keep it real, them hoes WAS nappy headed. Now KKKramer on the other hand, there was just no excuse for that. Say “nigger” once and maybe you’re a comedian bringing home a joke who’s bold enough to say the word. Say it twenty times while referencing lynching and Jim Crow laws, and we have a problem on our hands. Then Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton come out to play, and we all know they are here to save black people right? Right?

I, for one, thought his interview with Playboy was kind of funny. I find it very entertaining for someone to push the envelope and make people uncomfortable as long as it doesn’t get offensive. And his interview wasn’t offensive in the least bit. Not to me it wasn’t. I think if we all take a look at the controversial quotes from the interview, we’ll all agree that it wasn’t that bad.

When asked about his 2006-07 relationship with Jessica Simpson:

That girl, for me, is a drug. And drugs aren't good for you if you do lots of them. Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me... Sexually it was crazy. That's all I'll say. It was like napalm, sexual napalm...
There are people in the world who have the power to change our values. Have you ever been with a girl who made you want to quit the rest of your life? Did you ever say, "I want to quit my life and just fuckin' snort you? If you charged me $10,000 to fuck you, I would start selling all my shit just to keep fucking you.

I just thought this was funny as hell. But seriously moving on to the more controversial parts of the interview….

PLAYBOY: If you didn’t know you, would you think you’re a douche bag?

MAYER: It depends on what I picked up. My two biggest hits are “Your Body Is a Wonderland” and “Daughters.” If you think those songs are pandering, then you’ll think I’m a douche bag. It’s like I come on very strong. I am a very…I’m just very. V-E-R-Y. And if you can’t handle very, then I’m a douche bag. But I think the world needs a little very. That’s why black people love me.

PLAYBOY: Because you’re very?

MAYER: Someone asked me the other day, “What does it feel like now to have a hood pass?” And by the way, it’s sort of a contradiction in terms, because if you really had a hood pass, you could call it a nigger pass. Why are you pulling a punch and calling it a hood pass if you really have a hood pass? But I said, “I can’t really have a hood pass. I’ve never walked into a restaurant, asked for a table and been told, ‘We’re full.’”

PLAYBOY: It is true; a lot of rappers love you. You recorded with Common and Kanye West, played live with Jay-Z.

MAYER: What is being black? It’s making the most of your life, not taking a single moment for granted. Taking something that’s seen as a struggle and making it work for you, or you’ll die inside. Not to say that my struggle is like the collective struggle of black America. But maybe my struggle is similar to one black dude’s.

PLAYBOY: Do black women throw themselves at you?

MAYER: I don’t think I open myself to it. My dick is sort of like a white supremacist. I’ve got a Benetton heart and a fuckin’ David Duke cock. I’m going to start dating separately from my dick.

PLAYBOY: Let’s put some names out there. Let’s get specific.

MAYER: I always thought Holly Robinson Peete was gorgeous. Every white dude loved Hilary from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. And Kerry Washington. She’s superhot, and she’s also white-girl crazy. Kerry Washington would break your heart like a white girl. Just all of a sudden she’d be like, “Yeah, I sucked his dick. Whatever.” And you’d be like, “What? We weren’t talking about that.” That’s what “Heartbreak Warfare” is all about, when a girl uses jealousy as a tactic.

So let’s jump right into it here and start off with his use of the N-Word. Just from reading the interview as a whole, it’s quite obvious that dude was drunk, high, or both at the time. Don’t let the word control all of your emotions and think about what he’s saying for a second. See if John Mayer really had a hood pass, saying the word nigger wouldn’t be a problem in the first place. Granted he never should've said it, but what's done is done. He’s saying that he can’t be given a hood pass, for one, because he can’t really identify with the bullshit people from the hood actually have to go through. I think he’s trying to denounce the use of the term “hood pass” because technically if you have one, there’s no need for one. Does a hood pass automatically turn white people into honorary black people or something?

I’m not sure how this answer of saying what it means to be black relates to any of the questions he was asked, but he does have a point (whatever that may be). If you ask me what being black is, I couldn’t give you a definitive answer. Either way, I don’t see the problem with what he said here. Maybe having more famous rapper friends than me allows him to give his perspective on black people and people will actually give a shit, or at least pretend like they do. The only rapper friends I have are the ones who didn’t get a job after they left school and figured they could get a Casio keyboard and a mic and make some “music” in the empty room of their parent’s house. Silly negroes. Moving on…

Finishing this off in regards to his comments about having black women throw themselves at him, again I understand what the guy is getting at. I can identify with what he’s saying. I’m not against dating white women, but it just doesn’t seem to work out that way…ever. As far as having a white supremacist penis goes, you gotta give the guy some kind of props for the comic relief. If we move on to his reference of Kerry Washington being “white girl crazy” I mean take a really good look at her, I see exactly what he’s talking about. I could actually see her saying some off the wall shit like that.

With that said, I don’t think for one second John Mayer is racist. I think he’s a white boy who got a little drunk and a little too comfortable and fucked up. Shit happens. But seriously, don’t let it happen again Johnny Boy. Anybody care to weigh in? Do you think John Mayer is racist? Are you offended by what he said?