The New Wingman

In the last post we discovered the benefits of having an attractive white female for a friend, and how she can help you in your endeavors to hunt prey...er uhh... pursue a young lady while out for a night on the town. My same white female friend dropped another gem on me about the potential benefits of hanging with a not-so-attractive lady friend. That got me to thinking. Is there a new wingman in town? I mean if your main objective is to go out and pick up women, the only purpose your boys serve, is if your target of choice has Purse Patrol with her. So what are the benefits of having the beautifully challenged associate as opposed to a “bad bitch” by your side? I’m glad you asked. Let’s go out for night on the town.

Scenario 1: (Insert Beautiful Friend) So you’re out, having a good time and drinking with your friend. To the unsuspecting mind of a woman, this is either your girlfriend or the girl that you are trying to do something with in the very least. Why else would you be out with her anyway, right? Even though they will deny it to the grave, women are intimidated by other attractive women, no matter how high their self esteem is. Now that you know this, you will see that her thought process is telling her that she will have to do something other than just looking good to draw your attention away from your “girl-friend.” Attractive women are lazy, though. They’ve never had to work for anything, and they can generally get anything they want with a little flirting and showing of the goods. But when presented with a challenge they will shy away, (Side note: I know this because I read it on wikipedia, which is always true) unless of course she’s a whore, which is fair game in my book.

Scenario 2: (Insert friend with a heavy resemblance to Whoopi Goldberg) So you’re out, having a good time and drinking with your friend. To the mind of an attractive woman, you’re not a shallow person concerned with looks alone, therefore you won’t go chasing after every piece of scattered ass that you see passing by. This is a wonderful characteristic to possess because women will now believe that you are more concerned with who they are as a person (laughs uncontrollably), and they will see potential in you. On the other hand she will also say to herself, “This guy can do so much better.” And when Whoopi goes to the bathroom, you will be approached by the attractive young lady. The next step is important: do NOT immediately go for the kill, unless it’s just that easy. Play that nice guy role, but don’t be a simp. You don’t want her to know your true intentions until you get the drawz. Whether or not you disclose to her, that Ugly Betty is just your friend right then and there, is not necessarily important.

And there you have it. Now, go to the clubs, my flock, and test these theories. If they are successful, we do accept donations for providing an analysis and dating guideline for you. If they are not successful…well, maybe it’s just you. Good Luck!
For more relationship advice, please submit any questions you may have to myshoebag@live.com